Goals

I am trying to think of my Goals for this coming year...
Some are the same as last year...

1. Pack my lunch
2. Go to the Gym more

I am trying to phrase the next two so that I can get a clearer picture of them.

The first is to be more social. I can be almost perfectly happy at home.. but we are not meant to be alone... so I need to work on that.

and the second is to deveolp professionally.. I think I will do this by exploring some opportunities in ToastMasters.

But here is to a good 2009.

weird.. but nice

This time of year for the past couple years.. i have had my thyroid testing stuff done.. but we are taking the year off.. it is nice but weird to not have to go through it. I still had the stupid anti bodies last year.. but they only went up a little bit.. and my TG (which is pointless to measure since I still have the stupid anti bodies) is still nil. All and all, going the whole cancer stuff really taught me how to let go, because I have no control over any thing.

And going through all the gall bladder (i hate the name 'gall bladder', it makes it sound gross to me), bile leaking, pancreaticis stuff really taught me to value health and wellness. When I see people complain about life and stuff it makes me want to shake them.. as they have no idea how precious life really is, and how close we are all to death. Sorry for the morbid thoughts.. but after you go through major illness so close together, you think about that stuff.

And being sick, turned me into a person that worries about being sick again... When my neck is stiff.. is the lymph node we are watching getting bigger? Or when side hurts, is my bile duct leaking, or is scar tissue growing? Sigh... I am usually really good about not thinking about it.. except for when the above mentioned spots still hurts.
I asked one doc why it still hurt.. he said that those areas were traumatized.. and just not quite the same.. so some pain is normal. Granted.. the pain level is a 1000 times better since they diagnosed the bile salt diarrhea... (gross, it truly grosses me out) but every once in a while, feels like some one is stabbing me. Granted, this is usually after I do some heavy lift or stretching.. so i try and limit those movements.

want to remember

Tonight.

It is halloween, and neighbors were out on the streets talking like friends and kids were running around getting candy. I could hear the Decatur High School football match going on up the street. And I saw people standing in line at 8 o clock at night waiting to vote. Really, waiting to see people wait one one hand is great. That people are so passionate about voting that they were standing in line at 8 pm on Halloween. and the people at the end have over an hour to go.

The 3 Day

I just finished my 2nd 3 Day as the Camp Logistics Crew Captain.. and let me say. It was the hardest 4 Days of work. Between the rain,the wind and the relo and having less people... it was difficult. I could see it in my peoples eyes that they were frustrated by the lack of information that I had to give them. Which trust me, was frustating to me too.
I was as postive as I could be, and I am proud to say, I got a couple emails from my members that they would crew again.. maby not camp logistics but still crew. And if people are willing to come back and crew again, I say I did my job. as I am not joking when I say it is the most difficult crew to be on. It is so difficult because our job involves so many differnent tasks.. and well, the Komen tells me very little. I think I almost pass out on Saturday due to lack of sleep, no down time, and really bad food. We brought pizza in to camp for Dinner, and I swear, that pizza saved my life.
What I did to keep up my spirits on such a hard event was that I would cheer up walkers by walking up and down the line there were waiting in for hours and made people laugh by having smiling contest or telling them I would hug them and that I had not showered in a couple days. On Saturday at my lowest point, due to lack of sleep and food and just so exhausted I was in tears, a couple walkers stopped me and thanked me for for cheering them up on Friday, and gave me hugs just when I needed it.

All and all, it was a fun time, if you rethink your idea of fun. :) Cannot wait for next year, but I might try and do a different crew. Camp Logistics is truly very very difficult.

Now accepting hugs

I have turned a page in my life.. I now like hugs. I canme to the realization that people hug to say hi, or to try and make you feel better, and by being all standoffish I was rejecting their help or love. And why would I want to do that? I need all the love and help I can get.

Now.. this does not mean that I will not some time react strongly when people come in for the blind side hug. Those will probably still freak me out. But more because I dont see them coming and it is like some one is attacking you... and well... that freaks me out.

So hug away.

New Goals

As I seem to be wrapping up some current goings on (The 3 Day, and Small Group).. I am looking towards what goals I should make for my self next on the social and networking endovors. I need to set goals for my self in the areana, because given the choice, I will sit on my couch and read a book and be perfectly happy. Well, maby not perfectly happy.. but some what happy.
Right now I am thinking maby tennis, which seems to be huge in Atlanta.. and I can play.. maby I will look for some lessons. I need to contact my friend Grayson about how one finds a team.
Maby for church... there is a class that is offered in the winter that is a very heavy duty study of the bible.. not really a bible study.. but a scholarly study of the Bible for the puprose of learning some in depths stuff.

But knowing me.. these are not set in stone.. just some ideas that I am playing with.

Sad

I usually claim that I am not a huge fan of breakfast..

but then why is one the saddest parts of my day when I finish my coffee and yogurt?

Shock

As I sit here and watch the Cowboys and the Browns.. I am in shock that it is fall... Where did the summer go? All and All it was a pretty good summer..

I have enjoyed the training walks I did for the 3 Day. Merida was awsome. The baby showers for MMH and Peanut were alot of fun (as was the shopping for the presents) I have given three toast master speaches, and attended one ToastMaster contest (which I did horrible at.. but it was a great learning experence. I got a promotion. All and all pretty good.

This fall I have 2 3 Days to look forward too, church stuff and work stuff, and the holidays.

Half of me want to start planning for the winter.. but the other half of me is like.. slow down and enjoy what you are doing now.

Cooking

Ok.. I have been lazy the past 2 months.. and buzy.. but now that I know all my food is fresh.. (my frig broke, so threw out alot of food) so my renewed pledge is to cook dinner at home at least 4 days a week. Lets see how long it last..

And I cannot wait to go to Richmond!

how do you say no?

I must look nice.. as this is the second time this has happen to me.. and the second time I said yes.

Today I was at a Gas station up here near work.. and a guy in an old car with his wife and 3 little girls all in car seats was asking for Gas money so that he could drive home to Richmond VA. I saw about 4 people turn him down, and then he caught my eye. And my normal retort of I have no cash does not work at a Gas Station.. because he was like.. you can use your credit card.

So I said yes.. because I am too nice.. and when he asked how much, I let him fill up his tank.. which was about 57 dollars. Sigh. He was very thankful, and so was his wife.. and he had his 3 little girls all in cars seats all wave and say thanks. He offered to take my email address so he could mail the cash once he got home.. but I told him not to worry about it. I just wish I could claim it as a tax deductible donation. :)

Now I am nice.. but not stupid. I am a bit weary of scams. I had fear that he could some how clone my card or something. So I did not 'charge' the gas on my debit card.. but my credit card. So if he does some how clone it..A. He will not get much money as my credit limit is not that high. :) and B. And it will be much easier for me to freeze that account and not worry about life as I rarely use it.

But how do you say no a family in need when you have the means to help?

thank you

I needed to buy a ticket to VA for the 3 Day.. and tickets into Richmond have been averaging around 230$. But I was emulating JS, who impressively.. (in my head) is patient enough to wait for a airline sale. I am not usually. I normally just get the ticket at the regular price in fear that it will go up to a price that I cannot afford.
And my patience was rewarded.. there is a airline sale.. and I am saving 50 dollars on my ticket! So thank you JS was modeling that.. I have always been impressed with your ability to do that.

one my 13 TV

I need a new TV.. My big TV broke... and so I have been watching the olympics on my 13 inch TV that I bought my Sopmore year of college. I remember when I bought it.. it was a out of the box special at some now out of buisness electronic store.. it was like 70 bucks.. and my father told me that I should take it back because they had 'taken me for a ride'. Now 10 years later the only reason it is about to be defunt is because of the change to a digital signal..

but it has been soo much fun watching Micheal Phelps win 8 gold medals.. especially the 100 fly. http://www.nytimes.com/2008/08/16/sports/olympics/16phelps.html?ex=1376625600&en=0d2dff51d042a6b5&ei=5124&partner=permalink&exprod=permalink

Motion

I think that I have always gotten motion sick... as the stories go.. I was never pleasant on long car drives. And it seems to be getting worse. I used to be able to tolerate a little bit of reading and not looking outside, or being in the back seat for a little bit. Now if I am not in the front or driving.. I feel miserable.. i break out into a cold sweat, I start to get nauseated, I feel all weak, and I get a headache.. I hope it does not get worse.

I like my Mom

I called my Mom this afternoon to tell her about the oh so cute onesie I got for MMH and MTH's new addition.. otherwise known as my nephew! And we ended up having a 5 min. conversation about how we could not believe that we had both lived so long with out knowing the joy and necessity of a Pedicure.. :)

A couple weeks ago when MTH and I went out with BPH and EH and I told B that I spoke to our mother just about daily... he was in shock.. He had thought that EH was loony for talking and seeing her mom as much as she does.. and then he found out I did the same with our mother.

I guess daughters just have different relationships with the mothers then sons.

Because I am not busy enough

And my boss highly recommend I work on my communication style, I joined the ToastMasters Club at work couple months ago. And because I don't know how to say No, I am currently serving as the club's secretary. Sigh.. but it will look good on my resume.

So far I have given two of the 1o speeches I need to do to achieve the Competent Communicator level. My first speech, The Ice Breaker was named.. Three Things.. which if I say so my self was a pretty good speech.. I had people laughing and I won the best speech of the day award.. there were 2 other speakers that day. My second speech, Organize your speech was the project.. and my speech was named, vacations... and I don't think I did nearly as well.. as I did not prepare as well.. and I felt very rushed at the end. .. but I also had people laughing and pretty good audience participation. And I was very surprised to also win the best speech of the day award. There was only one other speaker and I thought he did a much better job.. and that he was much better prepared then me.

So far my feed back has been that I am pretty funny.. and I appear relaxed.. and I amazed that I am not using as many filler words like umm or like.. or so...

I am going to sign up for my next speech, and it is going to be call... Fighter.. Hopefully I can take some of the humor out.. because I need to work on not using humor. (This is my own goal.. not a toastmaster push.. I tend to use humor my communication style.. and humor is not always the best communication style for the work place, and I need to work on my work place communication.)

but it is fun.. and they are right when they say that the first is the hardest.. I was not that nervous at all this afternoon.

I was right all along

If you have known me for any length of time.. you know that I get car sick.. I have always gotten car sick .. and per Dr Gupta.. I have been doing the right things all along to make car trips bearable.

"The treatments are fairly simple. Always look outside and into the distance preferably. Use antihistamines to prevent and treat nausea, vomiting and dizziness. Ginger and soda can both help settle things down. Simply opening up the window and getting fresh air can help as well. Always sit in the front seat if you can. Even better, drive the car. That will be your best shot at eliminating a mismatch altogether." Granted I don't take an antihistamine.. but those either make me drowsy or feel like I am on speed.

And I have always been jealous of people that could read in the car.

Though I did feel guilty when I hogged the front seat in Merida.. but the team was very nice and let me in the front seat often. If it were a short trip or at night I tried to encourage others to take the front..

http://pagingdrgupta.blogs.cnn.com/

Sunburn

Sigh..

So I went up to Lake Lanier this weekend..

and the water is very low..

I guess the corps of engineer let those fish have too much water down stream.

And me in a brilliant move.. got a sunburn so bad that I blistered.. not as bad as the burns I got from canoeing or the blisters BPH got on his back at the pool party in Orchard Park when he was in the 6th grade. But still painful.. luckly only a little patch of blisters..that is spread across the tops of my arms and my cleavage area... makes shirts a bit painful.

Which Star Trek Charcter are you?

Good.. because The Next Generation was always my favorite.




Your results:
You are Jean-Luc Picard

Jean-Luc Picard		70%
Chekov		65%
Deanna Troi		65%
Will Riker		60%
An Expendable Character (Redshirt)		60%
Beverly Crusher		40%
Mr. Scott		35%
Geordi LaForge		35%
James T. Kirk (Captain)		30%
Spock		30%
Data		25%
Worf		20%
Uhura		15%
Mr. Sulu		15%
Leonard McCoy (Bones)		0%

A lover of Shakespeare and other
fine literature. You have a decisive mind
and a firm hand in dealing with others.

Sad

I found this blog a while ago when I was blogging around...

I checked it again this past weekend.. the blogger.. a mother of 6, age 37 died of inflammatory breast cancer. She has some pretty good lessons about life.. and death.

http://punkrockmommy.org/blog


It reminds me to not sweat the small stuff.. and to try and to simply live in day in wonder of being here.

July 4th

JS and I went up to our friend's Christie's cabin for July 4th.. and it was very interesting. Christie's cabin is on a very nice mountain about a 10 min drive from Blue Ridge GA.. so it is very nice.

I have been up here a couple times.. and usually we just hang out at the cabin.. since Christie does have a very nice house.. and we dont really meet the other people that live up here.

This July 4th.. we went out and meet the natives.


There are two types of people on this mountain.. people with money that have bought second homes.. (christie falls in to this category.. )and people that are from this area and have money. (rednecks with money).

In the afternoon we went to a bar b que up the road.. and it was cute.. calm.. good food.. and ok singer.. and relaxing. The mix at this party were people with money that have bought second homes.

Around 7 that night we went to the redneck party. The music was better.. and the food was OK.. but my god.. the people were sloppy drunk. They were all super nice.... and the view for the fire works was great. The best visual of the night was the 18 year old pregenat girl drinking wine and beer.. and no one was batting an eye over it. But we had a fun time.... We had a perfect view of the fireworks that were going on at Lake Blue Ridge about 10 miles away. It was a very interesting way to spend the day. But most important part of the day.. relaxing..